By: Mandie Schreck Growing up in a narcissistic household can affect a child’s development from adolescence to adulthood. Many people who grew up in narcissistic homes struggle with low self-esteem, anxiety, and depression. Narcissistic parents often lack empathy, encouragement, and even a desire to see their children succeed in life. Even if the individual cuts ties with their parents or guardians, the abuse can negatively affect their autonomy, mental health, and social interactions. If the parent continually taught their child that they were wrong or only made wrong choices, that child may develop a “people-pleaser” mentality. They may depend on...
Finding & Maintaining Motivation
By: Eileen Shea We’re entering into a new year, but the global health crisis that has been at the forefront of all our minds continues — now for the third calendar year. 2022 is the start of both a new year and a new normal. ARO is now hosting our first online event of 2022 — Finding Motivation: Transitioning to a New Normal as the Pandemic Continues — where we are addressing a variety of questions about resolutions, goals, diversity, outreach, and the overall impact of the pandemic on the Abuse Care Community. Join us at https://www.facebook.com/AbuseRefugeOrg for new content every day...
Recognizing Verbal Abuse & Setting Healthy Boundaries
By: Mandie Schreck Verbal Abuse can be difficult to overcome and even harder to set boundaries around. Establishing parameters for yourself can be a struggle when confronted with Verbal Abuse. How can you create a safe space for yourself where you have an open flow of healthy communication? Recognize Unhealthy Communication Habits The first step to creating healthy boundaries for yourself in a relationship of any kind is recognizing unhealthy communication and language. If you feel guilty, sad, or belittled in any way, start to see what words or phrases make you feel the opposite of uplifted and comforted. Begin...
Healing From Generational Trauma
By: Whitney Derman Generational Trauma affects many families. It is commonly caused by creating a cycle of abuse by which each generation ends up passing their fears, anxieties, and other issues they got from their parents to their children, who in turn pass it down to their children. “Even if the abuse itself is not repeated, the effects of abuse and traumatic stress can linger and trickle down from generation to generation in the form of fear, anxiety, shame, grief, unhealthy core family beliefs and behaviors, negative relationships, or unconscious cues and messages” (BetterHelp, 2021). There is no saying where...
Is Sexual Abuse Declining Or Is It Just Underreported?
By: Whitney Derman In recent years, reports of Sexual Abuse seem to have gone down slightly. The question is, “Why?” Is less abuse happening, or is it just not being reported? Both factors come into play, but one is more prevalent. Sexual Abuse and harassment are taken much more seriously than in the past, with sexual harassment seminars often being required for school and work and consent being a large part of sex education. People have also been encouraged to speak about their experiences with movements like “Me Too.” Mostly in Western society, there is less shame surrounding individuals who...
Extreme Religious Abuse: Healing Spiritually & Mentally
By: Mandie Schreck Spiritual or Religious Abuse is very complex because it has many layers. Not only does some Religious Abuse affect individuals mentally for the rest of their life, but it can also include other forms of abuse we educate on at ARO. When Spiritual Abuse coincides with Sexual, Narcissistic, Spousal, or Child Abuse, that’s when it becomes an extreme type of Religious Abuse. Spiritual Abuse can entail using scripture or sacred text to humiliate or demean the individual or enforce physical or emotional abuse (Brennan, 2020). Extreme Spiritual Abuse causes alienation, exhibits multiple forms of abuse, and completely...
Finding And Maintaining Motivation
By: Eileen Shea Goals Why do we set new goals in a new year? The calendar is simply a reminder to reflect on what you want to work towards, but can also provide a psychological reset. Perhaps the new year brings a greater sense of motivation or ability to succeed. Even though one digit doesn’t make you more capable; you were always capable. You may set new goals in various aspects of your life, including spiritual growth, personal growth, relationships, career, finances, and health, each bringing different kinds of fulfillment and benefits with the success of each change. In the...
Narcissistic Parents: How To Heal Or Strengthen The Bond
By: Mandie Schreck Narcissistic Abuse is often correlated with spouses, partners, or even friends, but what if Narcissistic Abuse starts from the day some of us are born? “A narcissistic parent can be defined as someone who lives through, is possessive of, and/or engages in marginalizing competition with the offspring” (Ni, 2016 ). Children and teenagers can be very receptive and impressionable to the standards, views, and influences their parents raise them with. Many children are encouraged to follow their dreams, question things for themselves, and learn about their likes and dislikes as they grow. However, some children are not...
Healing Begins With Acknowledgement
By: Mandie Schreck What are the first steps in the healing journey for individuals who have been abused? Acknowledging the abuse you’ve experienced and having a clear understanding that you are not the one at fault It can be difficult for many because you may have many underlying fears, regrets, shame, guilt, and questions about self-confidence and strength. Removing yourself from an abusive situation is one of the most challenging steps because of the strength it takes to recognize red flags, then take action to begin a lifelong journey. Healing is never linear, and it can take many years to go...
ARO Breathes Life
A Poem By: Josie Nelson Breathe in deep. Expand your lungs. Drop your shoulders. Raise your chest.Exhale s-l-o-w-l-y out your mouth, so you feel wind across your lips.Breathe in. Exhale out. Breathe in. Exhale out.Do you feel lighter? Do you feel brighter?Do you feel that little spark of hope that there’s more to come?More LIFE. More healing. More space to grow, not just upwards, but outwards.Up and out to reach as many as you can. Imagine a lotus flower. A symbol of regeneration. Enlightenment. Rebirth.A lotus flower starts in the dark, muddy waters growing in many different climates.An aquatic being....